hello again! today's been a little less stressful.

if it wasnt obvious from my poem.... i am worried about being pregnant! what a joy. i doubt i am because pregnancy tests came up negative a few days ago.... exactly 3 weeks after 'conception'.... and people say that's definitive... but i'm not going to stop worrying till my period comes back.

(well, it was the pullout method and i took an ellaone pill like 3 hours after..... and the tests were the more sensitive ones and were digital, so theres no confusion about the result....... auuawiajsidsaufrshgyuohefipajwdoak[pscmjnbguhskgie9ti0awo IM GONNA KILL MYSELF)

lately i've been thinking about cosplay. im going to miku expo in october (only way you will get me down to london.)

i wanna do one of those things where you wear a full on anime mask head and a bodysuit! but they're so expensive. i can afford it but i dont want to lose my savings.... i'll get a part time job soon, though.

i think it'd just be sick. i'd go to anywhere in it. i'd feel self conscious with my face showing but under a mask and bodysuit i could be anybody. would probs mess around with my boyfriend in it too.

i'd have to pick my top female character of all time.... hatsune miku. but if i were rich i'd get a bernkastel one, a rei ayanami one, a reimu one, a mokou one..... aaaaaugh it'd be so fucking cool

i think itd also be cool to use a corset waist cincher thing. im not fat or anything but it makes you look more 'anime' that way.

i haven't been to a convention for years. wouldn't know how things have changed since covid. but it'd be cool to do silly things and meet new people, while not having to worry about my own identity... (plus it'd be funny hearing a thick gross northern accent come out of miku's cute head)

it'd be weird having to try and be careful and clean with stuff though since im going to work in the animal industry cleaning out shit and stuff. i guess i need to be more girly every now and then.

i do cosplay in my own house every now and then but i only send the pictures to my boyfriend. recently i bought a sailor fuku that im gonna try and modify into a rena ryuugu cosplay (this is me being delusional, i won't ever get round to doing it) but it's a little big on me.

i recently lost quite a lot of weight so i've gone from a japanese size l to a japanese size s. and i plan to lose weight even more, so it's gonna be a bit of a pain finding stuff that doesn't look weird on me.

back